to be affected very strongly; to have too many things to deal with
I have heard the phrase “be careful what you wish for” repeatedly over the course of my life. But it wasn’t until the beginning of this year, that I really, really thought the adage applied to my life. Make no mistakes, I’m not about to kvetch or complain about something. As you read these words, I hope you know that there is an underlying feeling of gratitude within. However, I’m juggling a lot right now, and my arms are getting a bit tired!
Last year, when I was looking to buy an agenda from Bando, I had two design choices that caught my eye. One was the Lady of Leisure design. The other was the agenda that simply stated, “I Am Very Busy“. Because I am extra AF, I wasn’t trying to figure out which agenda was cuter. I considered my choice in this agenda to be a manifestation of how I wanted my 2017 to go. Yeah, I know. Extra AF!
Since going the starving artist route, I’ve jokingly referred to myself as a “lady of leisure” on numerous occasions. It sounds much nicer than “unemployed and broke as a joke“, doesn’t it? While the Lady of Leisure agenda would have been a fun nod to that, I wanted this year to be different for me. Better and more full, really. Because I decided that I wanted the year to be more active, I opted to get I Am Very Busy.
And since the start of the year, I’ve been super busy! It’s been great! I find myself working my tuchus off on this blog, striving to be more consistent. This year has also shown an increase in opportunities coming into my life. Which I am SO grateful for! But…. Whew!!! Between this blog, other gigs, and the obstacles of life in general, I find myself struggling to catch my breath at times. It is getting difficult to find my rhythm, which is a frustrating new experience for me.
Since the pace in my life has picked up considerably, it’s been difficult to catch my breath. I’m juggling multiple projects at the time, and finding my bearing has been a challenge. Everything has been tried to get my life together. After a few months of struggling, I found myself feeling a bit like Sisyphus. But the Universe isn’t cruel. Just as I was given the more active life I asked for, I got EXACTLY I needed to adapt to it.
A troubling disagreement in my personal life knocked me on my ass for a week. I fell deep into depression, and I found myself unable to get everything I wanted to accomplish done. The feeling of wretchedness was so strong. I felt like such a failure for only doing the bare minimum. But the funny thing is, the world didn’t end. Sure I didn’t get everything I had on my list done each day, but I got some things accomplished. So, why was I beefing about? Why was I beating myself up about it? And once I was back to feeling 100% again, I was able to get the missing tasks done with no problem.
When blessed with an abundance of opportunities in your life, adapting to the change can be difficult. But it’s not impossible, with the help of a little music therapy.
For moments when you feel like you are going to drown in your present circumstances, I suggest playing this song ON FULL BLAST at least three times in a row every day for a week. I hope that it reminds you that it is more than okay to put some things down from time to time and that it’s actually wise to do it.